Monday, November 9, 2009


Ok so today is NOT a good day. My morning turned into a bad dream so to speak. Today is a family members b'day (the one that has chosen to not be in my life) but I wanted to wish him a happy bday and Kaylee wanted to tell him that also. How could this be bad or the wrong thing to do? Well it can be wrong and bad when him and his other half decide they are less than happy with me doing that and have to blame me and tell me I have "issues". Who the hell doesnt have "issues"????? My so called issues are justified and right!!! (my opinion could always be wrong and I am wrong according to them) They see themselves as being totally right and everyone else is just attacking them and no one else s feelings matter. Yes these are two grown adults acting like children. There is no forgiveness in their heart or compassion or understanding. Its all about them and what everyone has done to them. Regardless of the truth. Do they even know what the truth is anymore? I seriously doubt it. I think they really believe their lies as their truth. I wonder what happened to the unconditional love you are supposed to have for your family? Its so not there from them. I love my family...I depend on my family...I need my family.....ALL of them! They are my strength!! They helped me through my toughest times as a struggling single mom of a premie when my daughter was born. ALL OF THEM!! Things get out of control and people say things they shouldnt...its happens...and we FORGIVE...atleast thats my take on how this is supposed to work. Shouldnt someone explain this to them????? Would they care? Nope because it doesnt fit into their little world and it would mean they werent 100% right or just in what they were doing.

So again I sit back and keep my mouth shut and respect my family and the chance that saying anything will backfire and cause more harm than good. I seriously am tired of keeping my mouth shut.....hence my extreme venting on here. Its my therapy so to speak. I cant tell them how I feel so I have to tell someone so here I am. This was supposed to be a silly little blog about my boring little life and the funny little things that happen, but it has turned into this. Yeah I will have my funny little quirky moments, but right now they are shut away behind this wall of frustration!!!

On the treadmill I go...10 incline to push all this anger out of me!!! Need to focus on me not them!!!


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